Everything is energy and that is all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics. – Albert Einstein
Thanksgiving is tomorrow. Whether you are elbow deep in flour or making a last run to the grocery store, there may be thoughts like these lurking under the surface of the busyness of holiday preparation:
I hope that Aunt Rachael and Dad don’t get into politics or the economy this year.
What if Jan (my mother-in-law) hates the way I made the turkey?
Did we have to invite Bob? He is always such a downer at the holidays ever since he lost his job.
Everyone has difficult people in their circle of family and friends. And the holidays brings everyone together, to simmer in their opinions, judgments and criticisms. For some, it is an annoyance to be born for a few days. For others, it can be a looming disaster that threatens to effect relationships far into the future.
It doesn’t have to be that way.
I have discovered a 5 step process that helps me fly through the holidays, enjoying myself and feeling great at the end of the night. I remind myself of the following truths before I enter a potentially stressful situation. I visualize interacting positively with the people who upset me in the past. And I touch base with the 5 steps if I feel myself getting drawn into a negative or emotionally charged exchange.
1. I only have control over myself. No one else.
I accept this fact and I remind myself of its truth whenever I am tempted to point out someone else’s faults or mistakes. I have no idea what that person is dealing with or what cross they carry, so my opinion of their words or actions is not necessary or helpful.
2. I only have control over my reactions, not others.
I cannot control anyone else’s reaction. So when I present the turkey or other dishes that I made, I know I created it with love and happiness. I did my part and I leave it at that.
3. Everything is energy.
When I hear what I think is criticism, I remind myself that “It’s only energy.” That takes away the emotional charge and allows me to choose my response from love instead of hurt. It also give me room to consider that I may have misinterpreted the comment.
4. I decide how I want to experience the holiday.
When #1 + #2 + #3 are added together, I always reach the logical conclusion that I get to decide how I want to experience the holiday. I make that decision before the event, by visualizing how I want the day to proceed. I hold that vision or idea in my head as I move through the day, making sure that I am responding and reacting in ways that are consistent with my vision.
5. I leave the rest up to God or the Universe.
I know that I can’t control others, so I do not set unrealistic expectations. I focus on what I want to experience and let go of the rest.
This 5 step process has worked its magic for me – consistently and predictably… as long as I did my part and stayed within my zone of happiness. Try it tomorrow and let me know if it also worked for you.
Remember – Albert Einstein said that “This is not philosophy. It’s physics.” Put the laws of physics to work for you and you will reap the benefits.