Time to Heal


I have a dear friend (Sarah) who struggled with a seemingly impossible situation for several years. Her daughter-in-law (Amy) was rude, obnoxious and refused to let Sarah see her grandchildren. When the issue was forced, Amy was especially critical, judgmental and made the visit so unpleasant that my friend would walk away stunned, then angry. Sarah looked into taking legal action, but did not want to pursue JohnLolaMazenekWeek3that route. She convinced Amy and her husband (Sarah’s son) that they should all go to counseling, but that did not resolve the negativity or shared anger.

Two weeks ago, I had lunch with Sarah and listened to her grief at not being part of her grand children’s lives. (By this time, Amy and her husband had moved next door to Amy’s parents, which was quite a distance from Sarah’s home.) I started to suggest that she strongly look into taking legal action (grandparents do have some rights in the state of Texas), but then I had a better idea.

My training in the material known as Infinite Possibilities has helped me see these types of situations from a totally different perspective. The energy that Sarah was using to stay angry, hurt and resentful was also filling up any space that could be used for healing. As long as her thoughts and beliefs were grounded in the fact that she was right and her daughter-in-law was wrong, nothing was going to change. Her thoughts, words and actions were going to spring from those beliefs and Amy was going to react in kind.  When she shifts her beliefs to love, kindness and acceptance, her thoughts, words and actions will also shift.

I also explained about the basic principle of “Thoughts Become Things”  and reminded her that it works 24/7. Currently, she was getting everything she didn’t want, because she was focused on those negative images and emotions. Change your thinking to what you do want and your outside world will also change.  Thoughts are powerful bundles of energy that actually mold the energy that you live in. Why not use these principles to get what you want most in life?

As I explained these basic principles, Sarah went very still and quiet. Her entire body seemed to be listening to my words.

“Are you ready to change and open the way to a new beginning?”

Sarah nodded and smiled.

“Then here is what you should do. Sit quietly and imagine spending quality time with your grand babies. They know you as a loving presence in their life, and Amy and your son are thrilled to have you share in the joy of their children.  Try to fill in as many details as possible to make it real, including what you feel in those moments.”

I looked to see if she was still attentive. Sarah nodded for me to continue.

“After you have completed your vision, write Amy an email and express your desire to see the babies. Let her know that it is her decision to allow it.”

Sarah looked at me in astonishment. “Is that it?”

“I know it sounds hard to believe, but your energy shift around why you want to spend time with your grandchildren will be communicated in your email. Amy will sense the change, even though there are no words used to convey it.”

She still looked skeptical, so I added, “What do you have to lose? If this doesn’t work, you are in the same situation that you find yourself now. But if it does work…”

Sarah sent me an email after Easter to let me know what happened. I have her permission to reprint it here:

“Remember our lunch when I said ‘I’m listening.’ I was and made my wishes known to my son and daughter-in-law. They came over today with the grand babies. We had an Easter egg hunt and a wonderful time together. Amy and I talked for about an hour and expressed ourselves to each other. Our perception of events, how it had hurt us, angered us and how we could move forward. We cried. We hugged each other, but most importantly, we communicated for the first time ever. ”

Isn’t that unbelievable? I was thrilled and excited that she had opened communication again and could now be the Grandmother she dreamed of being.

Do you have any troubling situations or worries? If you are caught in the vortex of anxiety or anger, it always helps to take a step back and see what you really want from the situation. Follow the steps outlined above and observe how it shifts your energy, which changes your thoughts, words and actions. A key question to ask yourself is, “Would I rather be right or happy?” If you are stuck on being right, the situation will not change. But if you are tired of trying to be right and you just want happiness, then these techniques will work.

Please let me know how this worked out for you – I would love to hear it!  Be well –

 

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Answers to the Questions


Sandra from MommyhoodbySandra fame has just nominated this blog for the Liebster Award.I am thrilled beyond words that someone thought enough to nominate Dare to Dream Big for an award. With gratitude and excitement, my answers to Sandra’s questions are below.

1. What is your motto in life?

“The Universe has a crush on me.” When I first heard this saying, I was struck by the utter simplicity of the message. It has taken me a bit longer to appreciate the long lasting effects. When you know at the core of your being that you are always supported and loved by God/The Universe, you realize that the only limits you have are the ones you put on yourself. That one realization has changed my life. Fear no longer controls my decisions, but actually acts as a signpost that what is behind the fear is something I need to embrace and accept. That truth leads to the second motto I follow – “Beyond Fear Lies Freedom.”

2. What serves as your inspiration?  SeeLionin Mirror

My connection to God – truly, everything I do is to reflect His presence in my life. When I see God in other people, He reflects back to me.

3. Why did you start blogging?

Writing has always been a way to process the events and emotions of my life. For some reason, when I express myself in the written word (even it if appears on a digital screen), I can step back from the emotion and see the patterns or themes. Blogging is an extension of that process – one that I hope helps others process the events of their lives. If I inspire just one person to lean more into God, than my words have done their job.

4. What has been your biggest accomplishment?

My biggest accomplishment is to connect with other like-minded, joyful people who love life and know that we are here to create our dreams! There is so much to discover about who you are and why you are here – I hope to provide a guide to help you on your journey.

5. What do you want to accomplish next?

I am working on a revised edition of my latest book, Dance With the Divine. I can see it help so many people, including teenagers struggling with questions of “Why did this happen?”  It should be available in the next six weeks on Amazon.com.

6. What is something you can’t live without?

I can’t live without God – I know that sounds unbelievable but it is so true. His love and presence is the foundation of my life. And He has a crush on me, remember? How can you not live without that?

7. What is the best advice you’ve given a friend who needed encouragement?

To step back and realize that the present pain is not permanent. There is a larger picture that you may not be able to see from where you are right now, but good always comes out of everything that happens.

8. What serves as your daily dose of happiness?

Receiving comments from my blog readers (hint, hint)! No seriously, I am happiest when I stop and just appreciate what is around me. For example, right now, as I am writing this, gorgeous sunshine is filtering through the trees and a soft breeze is flowing in from the patio.

9. Who is your role model?

I have so many – a few of the people whom I admire are: Marianne Williamson, Gabrielle Bernstein, Neale Donald Walsch, Mike Dooley.

Thank you again Sandra – Be Well!

Kathryn

Inspiration – Liebster Award


“Dare to Dream Big and Live Large” was just nominated for the Liebster Award. Thank you Sandra!

Mommyhood by Sandra

liebster

The other day I woke up really tired – as usual –  but was happily surprised when I read that Ladies Bulletin found my Blog to be interesting and worthy of being nominated for the Liebster Award. Thank you! It definitely lifted my spirits and made my Monday go by much, much quicker. In fact, that week was pretty pleasant and the message definitely felt as encouragement to continue writing. Maybe other people are interested in what I have to say, after all….

I think blogs serve as a platform to connect with others – It’s fun to laugh, feel inspired and/or get informed by what others write. I find it very interesting and entertaining to read other people’s views, perspectives and life experiences and I am glad others find my Blog to be amusing – I assume many parents go through similar experiences I go through in mommy land, so Mommyhood by Sandra

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Can Pinterest Define Me?


I have a confession to make – it’s not something I am especially proud of, because it seems so trivial and non-productive. When I spend time on this activity, one part of my brain is scolding me that I am wasting time.

“What possible benefit could this have to the world?” that strident voice demands.

I usually just ignore it…but then I realized that I was giving that voice more power by not looking at it. So this post is my attempt to “look at” that insistent message to see if it holds any value to me.

What is my confession? I love Pinterest.  No, that’s not quite accurate — I LOVE PINTEREST! (and I have pinned more than 2,800 items to prove it!)

If you are not familiar with Pinterest, it is a digital vision board. You create different topics and then find pictures, quotes, videos that are saved to that board. I have boards for places I want to visit, favorite foods, things for the home, etc.

But my favorite boards are My Favorite Quotes, Dance with the Divine and Infinite Possibilities. Check them out at http://www.pinterest.com/kathryneriksen.

Why does being on Pinterest make me happy? Because I create my boards and pin only those images that speak to me. It is completely and utterly my own creation, and just going through my boards can set the tone for the day.

But that is not all…I have discovered profound insight and wisdom in the pins created by others. For example, check out this pin that has a quote from Jack Canfield of “Chicken Soup” fame:  everything you want

Makes you think, doesn’t it? I could show you so many more pins but why not check it out for yourself? Go to Pinterest.com and create an account – then start playing! I guarantee you that you will start singing the “Happy” song as you begin to see the possibilities to have fun. And express yourself. Without judgment or criticism, because Pinterest is just for you.

That strident voice demanding that I stop pinning is no longer heard above a whisper. Whenever I do give it any attention at all, it is with a pin. That usually does the trick!